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Wednesdays are random. Sometimes we need to just go crazy and spout utter garble – babble babble blah! – We all need to let it out.

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Last week we didn’t quite make wednesday, but we did put it on friday, and we talked about how time just slips one by. This week is a more personal reflection on how things are.

We are once again in the month of NaNoWriMo. I wish I was doing it and yet I’m glad I am not. I mean, wow, it was a huge rush and all that jazz, but I gave up loads of things, pushed coursework deadlines to the limit, even though it still came first. And I won. I know I did. Come on, I finished something. For once.

It took a lot of restraint to not sign on to NaNoWriMo for this month. I did think about it, thought about it very hard in fact. I logged on and sorted my account out and left it to it. However, NaNoWriMo is a non-starter. Sadly.

I can’t – I mean I physically, can’t put in the time to complete this. But having spent the last couple of days just stuck in the house suffering from this terrible cold/sore throat thing that I have. It’s been mind numbing, debilitating. I can’t read. I can’t think. It hurts to breath and it hurts to think. I have work to do, dissertation work to prep, the literature review to hand in in about a months time. I’m working on it, but I can’t process enough stuff to do both, along with all the other bits of work, and group work and buddy meetings I have to work on. They expect us to be able to work in teams this year. When do they expect us to process our dissertation? Huh? Huh?

Forgive me, this is a grievance shared by many of our 4th year engineers. We feel that even though we get less exams because of the amount of coursework we do, most of this coursework is group work, with a small bit of individual work. And how do they expect us to process the amount of information we’re required to think through? Huh? Seriously.

I’m probably whining more because I’m sick and tired and have issues speaking/croaking whatever you want to call it. Yes I’m on antibiotics and stuff, but I still feel naff. Drained. Yuck. To even read a simple document on EU policy, in that dry dry language of diplomats, leaves me feeling disorientated and needing to lie down. Imagine now that I have to think about it and then write it up for a group document thats’s due, say … Wednesday by lunch time to meet the group deadlines so we can be finished by Friday. Now add another two groups worth of thinking and thoughts and discussions, add a sprinkling of block module weeks and voila, bye bye time. Bye bye self will.

Bye bye health or chances to get better.

So this is why NaNoWriMo is a no no this year. Lets work on Sons of Lur if we can. Even if I can’t make 50,000 words, I could make a few chapters worth. Maybe.

Maybe.

Oh give me some free time, some time to sleep, some time to get better. Just something.

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